rainbowfied-unicorn:

thefireinyoureye:

So it’s settled then. When my wife and I are 80 we are going trick-or-treating together as a hot dog and coke zero. Because who can really say “No” to two old ladies.

"Why coke zero?"
Oh my wife is diabetic.
"How considerate!"

thespacegoat:

straight girls tho, do you ever get confused by your sexuality because not only do men suck but also like 90% of women are fucking bombshells and only like 20% of men are like most chicks could pass for models and most men could pass for bridge trolls i mean wow

(via stumphies)

cosimaniehaus80085:

people getting in the clone club now probably is like

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(Source: delphinecormier19, via thecloneclub)

princesskenny456:

agianthordeofzombiesjust:

turnipss:

dredsina:

doctorwhothefuckisthis:

gutsygumshoe:

hakuryuusquad:

some people think that school food isnt all that bad and that we’re just whiny teenagers
u fucking get a rock solid jug of rotten milk then tell me that we’re just whiny teenagers

My freshman year of high school i got applesauce for lunch and when I opened it, a cloud of mold poofed out I feel this post on an emotional level

I broke my pb&j sandwich on the table once, it smashed into 7 pieces.

our hot dogs in elementary school were green

Once I opened a ketchup packet that was so old it was dark brown

Also once we had fried chicken and my friend found 2 of its organs in her chicken breast… :, )

I once got grape juice that was grey and slime. I made the mistake of not looking before it slithered into my mouth.

my high school had to stop serving us milk and juice my freshman year because a bunch of kids got terrible food poisoning from it. we were all warned not to drink the juice and milk because it was filled with mold. every lunch period after that I always checked my food and I found molded cheese on a sandwitch, stale pizza, green tortillas and a bunch of other stuff. I know its not suppost to be 5 star food but 3 star would be nice.

(Source: ibukin, via perks-of-being-chinese)

alisonhendrix170:

*tortures my husband with hot glue* it’s a metaphor

(via karenandthababes)

saepphire:

biifrost:

ॐ

❁

I am going to start swearing by authors

superwhatlocked:

becca-morley:

thepreciousthing:

thecoffeetragedy:

flippyspoon:

dragonsigma:

"Holy mother of Mary Shelley!"

"What the Tolkien?"

"By Victor Hugo’s spare underpants!"

"Jesus, Mary and Joseph Conrad!"

"Pardon my Molière, but I don’t give a Faulkner."

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Thank you supernatural fandom

(via godbless-st-cyr)

valiantparadox:

moniquill:

naamahdarling:

wrath-fire-ice:

Bury me in this.

*SCREAMS*

Get buried in this, get found by archeologists ten thousand years later, get presumed some kind of monarch or holy figure.

what do you mean presumed

Paintings Made By Murderers

ezraevangelista:

freshmevelyn:

psych2go:

psych-facts:

Paintings Made By Murderers

These are ACTUAL works of art by convicted killers. 

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Speechless.. 

These are exquisite

You gotta admit though, Hitler’s one was actually quite beautiful

(via lovequotesrus)

cutietips:

cutietips features daily beauty tips for anyone.
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